Falling Further Than Ever Before

I keep having flashbacks so I thought I’d write about one of them.

I was surprisingly calm and I was with a friend. I was relatively safe, in the woodland and that’s the way I liked it. The dog sniffed the plants that surrounded her and me and my friend chatted to the ends of the earth. It was a calm time for me, so why was my heart beating so fast? It was as if something inside of me knew what was going to happen. My friend turns to me and says, “Where’s the dog?” I turn around and run back home, because she usually runs back home on a walk. She wasn’t waiting at the front door. I started to panic… I told my dad that the dog had ran away and he went to look for the dog; he quickly found her, but by this point I was panicking too much to fully realise. I walked straight through the woods and over the mount. People were walking their dogs. “This is all your fault”, “You may as well die”: the voices were loud. “You are being followed!” it screamed. I tried covering my ears, but it didn’t help at all. I kept walking away from a non-existant killer.

I got to streets I was unfamiliar with and got very frightened, intensifying my fear of the stalker/murderer I was trying to escape from. I walked through a large forest, where I began to exhibit more and more hallucinations, this time they were visual. I saw many nooses hanging from trees. My pace quickened with panic as the voice started to whisper menacingly. I had nowhere to hide, and I didn’t want to turn back and go home, I was too afraid. Home was the last place I wanted to be at the time (and still is currently). I kept moving forward and soon exited the forest. This is when I realised where I was, “Keep moving forward” said the voice, “He’s right behind you, Quinn”. So I trudged through long grass, and towards a main road. I kept moving, sobbing. I ran for a little while, because I heard footsteps – there was no one behind me.

 

To be continued…

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3 thoughts on “Falling Further Than Ever Before

      1. I know, but when you write from your heart and experiences it shines through. I find writing to be therapeutic and will often write to ease my anxiety. There is much in your mind and heart that when written down can help yourself and others. Even if it’s just a glimpse into what you experience they might look at someone else they know in a somewhat similar situation with a bit more patience, understanding and compassion. Don’t take offense when I say it was interesting or entertaining, life shared is meant to be so and entertaining does not mean funny, but engaging.

        Liked by 1 person

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